I’d like to be a better procrastinator, but I never seem to get around to it.
The number one item on my “to-do” list is to make a “to-do” list.
You can’t really waste time if anything you might do is pointless; the key to being efficient is never having something to do.
I realize I am incredibly privileged to be in a position of such freedom; essentially, that position is prone, on the couch, napping.
I spend most of my time, riding bikes, smoking weed, and reading fiction. The rest, I squander.
I’m starting this business where I will take money to be lazy in your name. Busy professionals, don’t have time to smoke wees and go swimming in the lake? No problem; I’ll do that for you; I’ll even upload a Selfie so you can see how much fun you’re having!
I start to feel a little guilty at being such a bum; but, thankfully, it’s too much effort to keep that up.
I’ll be busy enough, soon enough, so I may was well enjoy this while I can; but if I don’t enjoy it, that’s even better since it means I’ve even wasted the time I could have spent wasting my time.
When I’m dead, no one will complain that I’m not working hard enough. So, see, I’m just preparing for the inevitable here.
I’ve read that our hunter-gatherer ancestors typically spent only a few hours a day in procuring food. The rest of the time, they hung around chatting, did art, and played games of chance. Fuck the “Paleo Diet;” I’m going for the full Paleo Lifestyle!
I’ve even given up shaving for the next few weeks; so much better to save five minutes on my morning ablutions when I have a mere 23 hours and 55 minutes to fill before tomorrow.
I think I’ll go the library now; or maybe I’ll just put that on my “to-do” list for another summer day.
The number one item on my “to-do” list is to make a “to-do” list.
You can’t really waste time if anything you might do is pointless; the key to being efficient is never having something to do.
I realize I am incredibly privileged to be in a position of such freedom; essentially, that position is prone, on the couch, napping.
I spend most of my time, riding bikes, smoking weed, and reading fiction. The rest, I squander.
I’m starting this business where I will take money to be lazy in your name. Busy professionals, don’t have time to smoke wees and go swimming in the lake? No problem; I’ll do that for you; I’ll even upload a Selfie so you can see how much fun you’re having!
I start to feel a little guilty at being such a bum; but, thankfully, it’s too much effort to keep that up.
I’ll be busy enough, soon enough, so I may was well enjoy this while I can; but if I don’t enjoy it, that’s even better since it means I’ve even wasted the time I could have spent wasting my time.
When I’m dead, no one will complain that I’m not working hard enough. So, see, I’m just preparing for the inevitable here.
I’ve read that our hunter-gatherer ancestors typically spent only a few hours a day in procuring food. The rest of the time, they hung around chatting, did art, and played games of chance. Fuck the “Paleo Diet;” I’m going for the full Paleo Lifestyle!
I’ve even given up shaving for the next few weeks; so much better to save five minutes on my morning ablutions when I have a mere 23 hours and 55 minutes to fill before tomorrow.
I think I’ll go the library now; or maybe I’ll just put that on my “to-do” list for another summer day.
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