Missing

No, I’ve never heard of that guy until now.  What’s he famous for?

Sorry, I’m not familiar with that podcast.  Honestly, I’m not really a podcast person.

Yeah, I don’t know anything about that series.  I haven’t even ever seen The Wire or The Sopranos.

I don’t have Instagram; I can’t open the link to that reel you sent me.

It’s a post on Facebook?  I’m not able to access that, either; I don’t have an account.

Not even sure what Substack is; do you capitalize it or not?

I do know what TikTok is, though; I can’t say that I’ve ever watched a TikTok video, however.

That article is behind a paywall for that website; I’m not a subscriber.

I’m sure that episode you’re describing was hilarious, but I can’t really bring myself to watch reality TV.

She has tens of millions of followers?  Wow.  I’m not one of them.

I guess I’m just not influenced by that influencer.

I must be immune to that viral video.

There’s a new trend trending on the internet.  Apparently, I’m not trendy.

This next big thing isn’t big enough to include me.

You can’t have FOMO if you’re not even aware of the thing you’re missing out on.

Everybody’s doing it, except for me, I guess.

I’m late for the latest thing; too old for the newest trend; cold towards what’s hot.

I haven’t heard what everyone’s talking about; haven’t seen what all eyes are on; I’m not excited about what’s new and exciting.

I don’t have a feed or a timeline or a queue; I’m sure the algorithm knows all about my preferences, but I prefer not to know what it knows.

I’m sure I’d be more “with it” if I were more with it, but it’s all I can do to keep up with all I can do.

Maybe I could be famous if I were hungrier for fame.  

For now, I’ll just be what I am.