Predictions

I predict that many of my predictions will be wrong.  And I predict that which ones those will be is unpredictable.

Nevertheless, we can be quite sure that by the middle of the 21st century, the year 2050 will have arrived.

We can also be entirely confident that anyone born today who is still living then will be alive.  Conversely, everyone who has died will be dead.

Forecasting sea-level rise is difficult to be sure.  But one thing we do know is that if the oceans rise by 12 inches, they will also have risen by a foot.

Global warming will only become more severe; that pot of coffee on my stove will continue getting hotter unless I turn off the burner, as well.

Every day that passes will add another 24 hours to everyone’s life, except for those who die during that period; as soon as they stop aging, they won’t get any older.

Two plus two will continue to equal four, although that one young couple who always has to bring their kid everywhere means you need to plan for five.

What happens will happen; whatever is will be what it is; and by the way, I told you so, didn’t I?  You may forget, but I won’t, I can assure you.

The future will always be in the future; the past always in the past, (not including women’s fashion.)  And the present? Well, I’m still waiting for that birthday gift you promised me!

Your favorite sports team will lose some games you wanted them to win; the team you dislike the most will win some they should have lost; every thrilling victory for one side will be accompanied by a heartbreaking defeat for the other.  And your cable bill or streaming cost will keep going up no matter what.

People who talk will keep using their words; babies will be born to their mothers; the final word of this essay be this last one.